I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
