Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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