after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
