i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Welp...herpes.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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