yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.