Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
people are starting to question the shark bite story
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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