Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Randomize
