I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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