You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize