i don't like sucking hair
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
My Sexting was not on an AP level
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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