Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize
