There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
