I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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