Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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