hell yes lets make some ravioli
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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