so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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