We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
