Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
