I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize