alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I can't put those talents on a resume
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
