Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
