did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize