I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
