He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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