I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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