How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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