We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
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