so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Randomize
