Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
