she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
