So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
