"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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