the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Randomize
