So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
