omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
