# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
