I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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