I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Randomize
