He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
We just shotgunned beers for America
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
