Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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