Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
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