FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
