Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
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