I am in a vortex of obligation.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
