is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
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