So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
