After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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