Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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