You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
