and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
